This is a transcribed copy of The Engagement. Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode. | |
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Previous: N/A | Next: Guess Who's Coming to the Wedding |
ACT 1 | |
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Speaker | Dialogue |
SCENE: 6151 Richmond Street, early evening. DOROTHY enters the house after a long day's work, and her bag down in the living room. She enters the kitchen, where COCO is cooking at the stove. | |
DOROTHY | I taught a class today, the finest school in Dade County. Two girls had shaved heads, and three boys had green hair. |
COCO | They're expressing themselves. |
DOROTHY | Well, I expressed myself. I told them to leave, they were too ugly to look at. Now the parents are mad. A father in a three-piece suit came in and defended Tiffany, a bald girl with a nose ring. |
DOROTHY looks at what COCO is making. | |
DOROTHY | What's that? |
COCO | Enchillads rancheros. |
DOROTHY | Why don't you just shoot me? |
DOROTHY sits down at the kitchen table. ROSE enters from the door to the garage. | |
ROSE | Hi. |
DOROTHY | Oh, hi, Rose. |
ROSE | What a day. One sad person after another. |
DOROTHY | Rose, you work at grief counseling. WHad do you expect, comedians? |
ROSE | Well, it'd be a nice change of pace. |
ROSE sits down at the table with DOROTHY. BLANCHE enters wearing DOROTHY's mink stole, all dolled up for an evening on the town. | |
BLANCHE | Dorothy, can I borrow your mink stole? |
DOROTHY | It's Miami in June, only cats are wearing fur. |
ROSE | (pouring herself something to drink) You going out? |
DOROTHY | No, no. She's going to sit here where it's 112 degrees and eat enchilladas. |
BLANCHE goes to the refrigerator, takes out a bag of cucumber slices. | |
BLANCHE | I just need some cucumbers to put on my eyes. |
DOROTHY | You'll have trouble seeing, Blanche. |
BLANCHE | It's very good, it reduces puffiness. |
ROSE | Does it work on thighs? |
BLANCHE | I don't know, honey. I don't need it on my thighs. |
BLANCHE exits. Rose tries to get up and follow her, but Dorothy stops her and has her sit back down at the table. COCO leaves his place at the stove. | |
ROSE | Who's she going out with? |
COCO | Harry...again. |
COCO exits through the door to the garage. | |
DOROTHY | Harry? Who is Harry? |
DOROTHY gets up and goes to the counter, grabbing a bowl of something to eat. | |
ROSE | All Blanche said was he still has his own teeth and hair. |
DOROTHY | (walking back over to the table) Oh, it is wonderful dating in Miami. All the single men under 80 are cocaine smugglers. |
DOROTHY sits back down at the table. | |
ROSE | You know, I'd kill to be 20 again. |
DOROTHY | Oh, I'd kill to be 40 again. You know, I had the shock of my life today. |
DOROTHY | I was in the teacher's lounge talkign to a group of girls in their twenties. They were so pretty. At that age, you don't even have to be pretty, and you're pretty. Anyway, we were laughing and giggling and having a great time, and I completely forgot that I was older. I just felt like...one of the girls. And we had a wonderful time. |
DOROTHY | Then I got into my car and caught a glimpse of myself, and I almost had a heart attack. This old woman was in the mirror. I didn't even recognize her. |
ROSE |
...who was it? |
DOROTHY pauses for a long time, then glares at ROSE. | |
DOROTHY | It was me! |
ROSE | Oh! |
BLANCHE enters the kitchen, no longer wearing the mink stole. | |
BLANCHE | Rose, I'm borrowing your earrings. Lord, I'd love to get a facelift by 8:00. |
BLANCHE starts to exit the kitchen, but stops when Dorothy calls after her. | |
DOROTHY | Blanche! Who is Harry? |
BLANCHE | Oh, girls, he's just wonderful. He's very gallant. He's a perfect gentleman, he's a great dancer. And he doesn't make noises when he chews. |
DOROTHY | Chewing, that's way up there on my list. Comes right after intelligent. |
BLANCHE | He doesn't talk loud at the movies, doesn't take his own pulse, and...he's still interested. |
ROSE | In what? |
Long pause. | |
DOROTHY | (taking ROSE'S hand) Rose, if you have to ask, then it does not matter anymore. |
BLANCHE | And...he proposed. |
BLANCHE exits the kitchen. DOROTHY and ROSE exchange shocked looks. They get up and follow her. | |
ROSE | Blanche! |
BLANCHE enters the living room, followed by ROSE and DOROTHY. | |
ROSE | He proposed?! You've only known him a week! |
BLANCHE | And he wants an answer tonight. |
DOROTHY | Tonight? To...Blanche, what're you going to tell him? |
BLANCHE | I don't know. You know, he's very wonderful, but I have only known him for a week. |
ROSE | That's right. |
BLANCHE | But I don't want to lose him. Oh, girls. I just don't know what I'm gonna tell him. I have to go put on my face. |
BLANCHE exits through the lanai. DOROTHY and ROSE move STAGE RIGHT as they talk. | |
ROSE | What if she marries him? What's going to happen to us? This house is hers. |
DOROTHY | (sits down in one of the chairs) Then we'll move. |
ROSE | We can't move. What do we have for collateral? A gay cook? |
DOROTHY | Oh, come on, Rose. Nobody is getting married. (gets up from the chair) Now let's go talk to Blanche. |
DOROTHY and ROSE walk to the entrance to the lanai. | |
ROSE | Dorothy! We'll become bag ladies! |
DOROTHY stops walking, looks at ROSE strangely. The two exit through the lanai entrance. | |
SCENE: Blanche's bedroom. BLANCHE sits at her vanity applying lipstick when she hears a knock at her door. | |
DOROTHY, off-screen | Blanche? |
BLANCHE | Come in. |
DOROTHY and ROSE enter, walk over to the vanity. | |
DOROTHY | Blanche, Blanche your friend Harry wants an answer tonight. What are you going to tell him? |
BLANCHE | I haven't decided. (smiles) I guess I'll know when I hear it come out of my mouth. |
DOROTHY | You'll know when you hear it come out of your mouth? This isn't a belch, Blanche. This is marriage! |
DOROTHY looks at BLANCHE's vanity. There is a large collection of makeup on it. | |
DOROTHY | Would you look at this? She has more colors than Benjamin Moore Paints. |
ROSE puts her hands on BLANCHE'S shoulders, as if to comfort her. | |
ROSE | You mustn't rush into anything, Blanche. You hardly know him. |
BLANCHE | I just wonder what my husband George would think about me and Harry. |
DOROTHY | Well, if he was alive, he probably would not like it. But since he's dead, I don't think it poses a problem. |
BLANCHE | I just want him to know that I'm happy, but that I could never be as happy with Harry in the same way as I was with him. |
ROSE | He knows, Blanche. He knows. All your thoughts and feelings go right to him. Right, Dorothy? |
DOROTHY | Oh, don't ask me. I couldn't get through to New Jersey with MCI. |
OFF-SCREEN: The doorbell rings. ROSE and DOROTHY move towards the bedroom door. | |
BLANCHE | That's him, he's early! I haven't finished my face. |
DOROTHY | The only thing left is to dip it in bronze. We'll get it. (DOROTHY and ROSE exit.) |
BLANCHE | Thanks! |
SCENE: LIVING ROOM. ROSE and DOROTHY go over to the front door. | |
DOROTHY | (preparing to open the front door) I wonder what he looks like. |
ROSE | I just hope that he doesn't have hair in his ears. |
DOROTHY pauses, slowly looks over at ROSE. ROSE shudders and grimaces to ilustrate her point. DOROTHY stares at her for a moment, then opens the front door. SOPHIA enters, carrying a large brown paper bag with her belongings. DOROTHY and ROSE, surprised, let her pass. | |
SOPHIA | Hi, there. |
DOROTHY | Ma! |
SOPHIA enters the living room. | |
DOROTHY | Ma, what's the matter? |
SOPHIA | (setting down her bag) Everyone is fine. No one died. The home burned down. |
DOROTHY | My god, are you alright?! How did you get here? |
SOPHIA | I hitched. |
DOROTHY | Oh, Ma! |
SOPHIA | A cab! I took a cab. |
DOROTHY | Well, you should've called! |
SOPHIA | I'm perfectly capable of managing by myself. I don't need help. I'm a totally independent person. |
DOROTHY | I know, I know. |
SOPHIA | I need $67 for the cab. |
DOROTHY is shocked. | |
DOROTHY | $67?! (she realizes that Sophia is serious) Ma, Ma, this is crazy. The home is fifteen minutes from here! |
SOPHIA | My cab driver is Cuban. He said there was an additional tax for a bilingual driver. |
DOROTHY | I'll take care of him. |
DOROTHY grabs her purse from the coffee table, exits STAGE RIGHT. ROSE guides SOPHIA onto the couch. | |
ROSE | Sit down, Sophia. You must be exhausted. |
SOPHIA | Why? I rode in the cab, I didn't push it. |
BLANCHE enters, wearing a mink stole and a full face of makeup. She is pleasantly surprised by SOPHIA'S arrival. | |
BLANCHE | Oh, Sophia, honey! How nice to see you! |
SOPHIA | Who are you? |
BLANCHE | It's me, Blanche. |
SOPHIA | You look like a prostitute. |
ROSE looks aghast by SOPHIA'S language. BLANCHE appears to stifle a laugh. | |
ROSE | Sophia, the things you say! She didn't mean that, Blanche. |
SOPHIA | Of course I mean it! Look at her! My cab driver would fall in love! |
SOPHIA gets up from the couch, walks STAGE LEFT to the kitchen door. | |
SOPHIA | Can I get something to eat, or is the fancy man in the kitchen? |
SOPHIA exits into the kitchen. ROSE stands up from the couch. | |
ROSE | The way she talks...! |
BLANCHE | She can't help it. |
ROSE | (scoffs) I've known plenty of women who've had strokes. Some of them are in very bad shape, but they're still ladies. |
BLANCHE | But Rose, this stroke destroyed the part of her brain that censors what she says. She just says whatever she thinks, she can't help it. |
SOPHIA enters from STAGE LEFT, carrying a snack. | |
SOPHIA | He's an okay petunia. |
DOROTHY enters from STAGE RIGHT, carrying her purse and looking angry. She shuts the front door. | |
DOROTHY | Ma. Ma, the cab driver says you promised him a $67 tip?! |
SOPHIA | Don't be silly, I said a six, seven dollar tip! Why don't these people learn English if they're going to live here? This is Miami! (sits down in a chair) I'd have less trouble getting around Ecuador! |
The doorbell rings. BLANCHE goes to answer the door. | |
BLANCHE | Oh, I'll get it. |
BLANCHE opens the door. HARRY is standing in the doorway. | |
BLANCHE | Harry! |
HARRY | Ah, my pretty! |
HARRY enters the house as he talks, taking BLANCHE'S hands and kissing them. | |
BLANCHE | Everybody, this is Harry. Harry, this is Rose. |
HARRY greets ROSE. | |
BLANCHE | And Dorothy. |
HARRY greets DOROTHY. | |
BLANCHE | And this is Sophia. |
HARRY | Well, you must be Blanche's sister. |
SOPHIA | You must be blind. |
HARRY stares at SOPHIA, a bit shocked. BLANCHE chuckles. | |
BLANCHE | Sophia's home just burned down. |
HARRY | Why, that's terrible! |
SOPHIA | Not to me. It was a retirement home, and you know what they did? They set off the fire alarm in a retirement home. Who can rush? Half the people have walkers, the other half can't get out of their chairs. But they got bells going off like crazy. You know what that does to hearts that only beat a few times a week? (shakes her head) It's not pretty. |
HARRY guides BLANCHE to the door. | |
HARRY | Uh, we'd better go. We have reservations. |
SOPHIA | I hope he's taking you to a cold climate. |
HARRY | Good night. Thanks, ladies. It was a pleasure. |
DOROTHY | It was nice meeting you, Harry! Have fun! |
HARRY and BLANCHE exit through the front door. | |
SOPHIA | The man is a scuzzball. |
DOROTHY throws her hands up and walks STAGE LEFT towards SOPHIA. She stops by SOPHIA'S chair, and the two exchange pointed looks. ROSE sits down on the couch, despaired. | |
ROSE | This is so sad. We were all so lonely, and then by a miracle, we found each other. |
DOROTHY | Rose, we both answered an ad to share Blanche's house that we found in the supermarket. It was not the Resurrection. It is hardly a miracle. |
ROSE | To me it was a miracle! Because we were happy. |
ROSE | (sighs) It's not fair, you know. I mean, we get married, we have kids, the kids leave, and our husbands die. Is that some kind of a test? |
As ROSE speaks, DOROTHY sits next to her on the couch and holds her hand. | |
ROSE | You don't...you don't work that hard, you don't go through everything you go through just to end up alone. I mean, we are alone, Dorothy. We really are. Our families are gone, and we're alone. And there are too many years left, and I don't know what to do. |
SOPHIA | Get a poodle. |
ROSE and DOROTHY turn to look at SOPHIA. SOPHIA takes a bite of her snack. | |
SCENE: 6151 Richmond Street, the lanai, night. ROSE, DOROTHY, and COCO are sitting on the lanai in their pajamas as COCO pours them some iced tea. ROSE takes a glass. | |
ROSE | It's yes. I know it is. She's going to marry him. |
DOROTHY | Oh, come on, Rose. |
ROSE | Well, she can't help it! Blanche needs a man. She told me when George died, she made a date at the funeral. Oh, not that she didn't love George. She can't...be without a man. You know what I'm saying? |
ROSE makes some subtle motions with her glass to illustrate her point. DOROTHY is silent. | |
DOROTHY | What am I doing up? (As she speaks, she sets down her glass of iced tea and gets up.) I'm subbing for a teacher who was shot by a student. I need all the sleep I can get. |
DOROTHY exits the lanai, STAGE RIGHT. As ROSE speaks, ROSE and COCO follow her into the living room. | |
ROSE | I used to sleep so well. I never even turned over. I'd wake up with a perfect hairdo. |
ROSE | (laughs) Charlie, on the other hand, moves all night long. (She sits down in a chair.) His side of the bed looks like a murder took place. |
DOROTHY | Rose, Charlie is dead. |
COCO | Why tell her? |
COCO walks STAGE LEFT towards the kitchen. | |
ROSE | I know he's dead. I'm not crazy. I just like to talk about him in the present tense sometimes. Makes him feel closer. |
COCO | That's fine, Rose. You do that. I don't mind at all. |
DOROTHY | Sure, Rose. Set a place at the table. |
BLANCHE enters the house carrying the stole she was wearing. ROSE, DOROTHY and COCO all move STAGE RIGHT to greet her. | |
BLANCHE | Well, hi! |
DOROTHY | What happened? |
BLANCHE | Oh, we had the nicest time. We went to Joe's, have you ever been to Joe's? |
DOROTHY | Yes, what happened? |
BLANCHE | I had the stone crabs. I never had stone crabs. You ever have stone crabs? |
DOROTHY | What happened? |
As she talks, BLANCHE sets down the stole and sits down in one of the chairs. | |
BLANCHE | I was just so relieved they didn't have eyes. I can't eat anything with eyes, like lobster. |
ROSE | I can't eat anything that moves. |
DOROTHY | Like what, Rose? Horses? |
ROSE | Like oysters! |
COCO | Oysters don't move! |
DOROTHY | (turns to Coco and Rose and shouts) Coco, they could dance! Who cares?! |
DOROTHY | (turns back to Blanche) Tell us. |
ROSE | Oysters move! Very slowly! You have to watch very closely! |
DOROTHY stares at ROSE and ROSE backs off. | |
DOROTHY | Blanche, are you going to marry Harry? |
BLANCHE | (giggling) Marry Harry, marry Harry. |
ROSE | (laughs) A little rhyme. |
DOROTHY | Knock it off. Are you? |
BLANCHE is silent for a moment, still very giggly. | |
BLANCHE | Yes. Next week. |
DOROTHY, ROSE and COCO are shocked by the news. |
ACT 2 | |
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Speaker | Dialogue |
SCENE: 6151 Richmond Street, living room, night. BLANCHE has revealed that she is marrying HARRY, and ROSE, DOROTHY, and COCO are shaken by the news. | |
ROSE | I knew it. I knew she was going to marry him. |
DOROTHY | But...next week? |
BLANCHE | At our age, long engagements don't make sense. (She gets up from the chair and grabs the stole.) I have to go to bed. |
ROSE | Where will you live? |
BLANCHE | Well, here. |
ROSE | Where will we live? |
DOROTHY | Oh, don't worry about it. We'll live, we'll live. |
BLANCHE | Oh, I hadn't thought of that. |
ROSE | It's just so hard to find a place to live. |
BLANCHE | Well, you can just stay right here. |
ROSE | Well, that's settled. |
DOROTHY | Oh, Rose! How can we stay here with her and Harry? |
BLANCHE | Well, you certainly can until you find a place! |
ROSE | However long that takes. |
BLANCHE walks towards her bedroom. | |
BLANCHE | We're going to New York for the honeymoon. I just hope I don't get murdered. |
BLANCHE exits. DOROTHY and ROSE sit down on the couch. | |
ROSE | Charlie and I waited two whole years before we got married. |
DOROTHY | I got married before my father finished the sentence. |
ROSE | (looks at Dorothy in shock) You married your father?! |
DOROTHY cringes for a brief moment. | |
DOROTHY | My father told Stan that he had to marry me. I was pregnant. |
ROSE | You had a blowgun wedding?! |
DOROTHY | If you live in the Amazon. In Queens, it's called shotgun. |
ROSE | Well, maybe that's why he left. Because you forced him into it. |
DOROTHY | Rose, he left me thirty-eight years later for a stewardess that he met on a business trip to Hawaii. It was her first flight. They said, ‘On arrival, give the passengers a lei.’ She got confused, he got lucky, and they now live on Maui. |
DOROTHY | It's really wonderful. A sixty-five year old man with gout learning to windsurf. I hope he trips on his thong and falls into a volcano. |
SOPHIA enters from STAGE LEFT. | |
SOPHIA | Oh, it's you! |
ROSE | Oh, Sophia, did we wake you? |
SOPHIA | I heard voices. I thought it was robbers, so I hid my jewels. Now I can't remember where. |
DOROTHY | Ma, you don't have any jewels! |
SOPHIA | Thank God, because I can't find them. |
SOPHIA sits down in a chair. COCO enters from the kitchen, STAGE LEFT. | |
COCO | Tea, Sophia? |
SOPHIA | How about a shot of gin with a beer back? |
COCO begins clearing the glasses of tea as the ladies talk. | |
ROSE | That was dumb of me to have tea this late. I'll go to sleep and have to get up and go. |
DOROTHY | Yeah, and wake me up. You know, if you didn't drink before bedtime, you wouldn't have to wake up in the middle of the night. |
ROSE | I don't drink before bedtime! I stop all liquids at noon, and I still wake up. |
SOPHIA | I never have that problem. Never. I sleep like a log. I never get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. I go in the morning. Every morning like clockwork. At 7:00 AM, I pee. |
SOPHIA | Unfortunately, I don't wake up til 8:00. |
ROSE and DOROTHY stare at SOPHIA. | |
TIME LAPSE: One week later. SCENE: 6151 Richmond Street, Blanche's bedroom, early afternoon. DOROTHY is in BLANCHE'S bedroom, waiting for her to come out of the bathroom. ROSE enters, looking worried. | |
ROSE | Where's Blanche? |
DOROTHY | In the bathroom. |
ROSE | I've got to talk to you. |
DOROTHY | What is it? |
ROSE | I know it sounds crazy, but...I'm suspicious. |
DOROTHY | Of what? |
ROSE | Harry. |
DOROTHY | Harry? |
ROSE | And I don't know why. There's just something about it I don't like, and I have to tell Blanche. |
DODORTHY | Tell Blanche what? |
ROSE | That she can't marry him! |
DOROTHY | The wedding is in twelve minutes! You can't tell her that! |
ROSE | I owe it to her! I'm her friend! |
DOROTHY | But there's nothing to tell her! This is just some crazy hunch. |
ROSE | My hunches are never wrong. Mrs. Gandhi would still be alive today if she had taken my call. |
DOROTHY pauses for a brief moment. | |
ROSE | I'm going to tell her. |
DOROTHY | (grabs Rose as she tries to walk past her) You are not. I will not let you! |
BLANCHE enters, crying. DOROTHY and ROSE immediately stop fighting. | |
BLANCHE | I can't stop crying. I'm so happy and so sad. Kind of a happy sad. |
ROSE | Speaking of sad, Blanche... |
DOROTHY | Shut up, Rose. |
ROSE | She's crying already. What's the difference? |
DOROTHY | Rose, pick that up. (She picks up something on Blanche's vanity and throws it behind her.) |
BLANCHE | I just can't believe it. I'm getting married! What do you think about that? |
ROSE | I think it's a mistake. |
DOROTHY | To wear all that makeup. |
BLANCHE | I know it's fast, but I just don't know when I'll find another like him. He just... (BLANCHE goes over to her bed, sits down with DOROTHY and ROSE.) Oh, girls, girls, he makes me feel so good, so young, so happy. |
DOROTHY | Aw. Rose, did you hear that? So happy. |
ROSE forces a very obviously fake smile. BLANCHE gets up from the bed. | |
BLANCHE | Now I have to go to the bathroom again. (She walks towards her bathroom.) When I get nervous, I have to go all the time. That's why I'm getting married here at the house. Public bathrooms are so difficult for me. I wash my hands so thoroughly, and then I find it so hard to get out again without touching the doorknob. |
BLANCHE enters her bathroom. | |
ROSE | (shouts) Don't! |
DOROTHY | Uh, be too long! |
DOROTHY grabs ROSE from behind and covers her mouth. | |
DOROTHY | Rose, that is a happy woman in there. Now, I want you to promise that you will not say anything. (She forces Rose to nod.) Do you promise? |
BLANCHE returns from the bathroom, DOROTHY pretends that she was hugging ROSE to cover their tracks. | |
BLANCHE | Well, what's got me so sad... (She sees Rose and Dorothy pretending to hug.) Oh...Oh, I just... |
BLANCHE goes over to them and hugs them. | |
BLANCHE | I just never, never had two better friends. I just can't stand the thought of leaving you. |
DOROTHY | Oh, Blanche, you look gorgeous. Shut up, Rose. |
DOROTHY | Are you ready? |
BLANCHE | (exiting to her bathroom, STAGE LEFT.) Yes, I guess! |
ROSE | (shouts) Stop! |
DOROTHY grabs ROSE and shoves her into BLANCHE'S closet just as BLANCHE comes back into the bedroom. COCO enters from STAGE RIGHT. | |
COCO | The minister's here! |
BLANCHE | Oh, I need perfume! |
DOROTHY | (picks up some perfume from BLANCHE'S vanity.) Perfume, perfume. Come on, let's go. |
BLANCHE and DOROTHY exit STAGE RIGHT as DOROTHY sprays her with perfume. COCO goes over to BLANCHE'S bed and smooths out the bedspread, but is interrupted by ROSE knocking from inside the closet. | |
TIME LAPSE. SCENE: Living room, half an hour past wedding time. BLANCHE is looking out the front door while her roommates, COCO, and the MINISTER are in the living room. HARRY has still not arrived, and she is getting worried. COCO goes over to BLANCHE to comfort her. | |
BLANCHE | He's a half-hour late. |
COCO | He probably got caught in traffic. |
MINISTER | Ladies, I'm on a tight schedule. This is Miami. I've got funerals backed up. |
COCO | Give us a few minutes, please. |
MINISTER | Five minutes more, then I've got to bury Mr. Pinkus. |
The doorbell rings, much to BLANCHE'S elation. She runs over to the front door. | |
COCO | You see? |
BLANCHE answers the front door, only to see a police officer on the porch. | |
POLICEMAN | Is there a Blanche Hollingsworth here? |
BLANCHE | (fearful) Oh, God, he's been killed. |
POLICEMAN | Arrested. |
BLANCHE | What? |
POLICEMAN | He gave me this to give to you. (He hands Blanche an envelope containing a letter from Harry.) He's a bigamist, ma'am. He's wanted in four states. He's got six wives. You got yourself mixed up with a real hustler. (He tips his hat, offering his condolences.) I'm sorry. |
The POLICEMAN exits. The MINISTER gets up from the chair and exits through the front door. | |
MINISTER | Well, you won't be needing me today. |
BLANCHE stands in the living room, completely in shock. DOROTHY goes over to her, offering comfort. | |
DOROTHY | Blanche, do you want to read the note? |
BLANCHE shakes her head. | |
DOROTHY | Do you want me to read it to you? |
BLANCHE hesitantly nods. DOROTHY takes the letter and opens it, reading it aloud. | |
DOROTHY | "Dear Blanche, I guess you know by now. I'm really sorry. The thing is, I really liked you. This time was different. You're a special lady. Maybe someday you'll write to me. Harry." |
BLANCHE | (quietly) Oh, God. I'm stunned. I'm just stunned. |
DOROTHY | Oh, I know. |
BLANCHE goes over to the couch and sits down, trying to hold back tears. | |
BLANCHE | Oh, I feel like such an old fool. Not just a fool, but an old fool. My God, I just wanna die. |
ROSE | You're not a fool, Blanche. (She sits down next to her and holds onto her.) You're a beautiful, loving, trusting woman. There's no fool here, Blanche. |
BLANCHE | I guess maybe I'm hoping the shock will be too much for my heart and I'll just drop dead right here. And the minister can bury me with Mr. Pinkus. I won't have to look anyone in the eye ever again. |
ROSE | Except maybe Mr. Pinkus. |
DOROTHY sharply pinches ROSE'S shoulder. | |
TIME LAPSE: Three weeks later. SCENE: 6151 Richmond Street, the lanai. ROSE is sitting at the patio table reading, while SOPHIA is resting her eyes on one of the patio chairs. DOROTHY enters from the house, carrying a wet newspaper. | |
DOROTHY | If I meet our paperboy, he will not live to be a paper man! (She lays the wet papers on the bushes in the sun.) Florida is having a drought. In the entire state, there is not enough water to make a cup of tea. He finds a puddle. |
DOROTHY goes over to SOPHIA and takes a mirror out of her purse. She holds it up to SOPHIA'S mouth. | |
ROSE | What are you doing? She's sleeping. |
DOROTHY | Just checking. You never know. Tell me, how is Blanche? |
ROSE | She didn't go to work again today. It's been three weeks and she just sits in her room. The museum's gonna fire her. |
DOROTHY | (Sits down in a chair next to Rose.) Well, we've tried everything, golf, the movies, theater tickets. She wouldn't even budge for Julio Iglesias. |
ROSE | I know grief. It takes time. |
DOROTHY | Please, Rose. Listen, if you're Irish, you have a wake. You eat, you cry, you drink, you vomit, and you're done. If you're Jewish, you cry, you sit, you eat for seven days, you put on ten pounds, and it's over. We Italians scream, dress up a donkey, hire a band, and that's that. It's these southern Protestants who make it a way of life. |
SOPHIA | When I go, put me in a steel sack and leave me on the curb next to the cans. |
DOROTHY | We thought you were asleep. |
SOPHIA | You never know. |
BLANCHE enters from STAGE LEFT, smiling at the ladies. | |
BLANCHE | You girls shouldn't sit out here in the sun. |
ROSE and DOROTHY are relieved to see her again. | |
ROSE | Blanche, we've been so worried about you. |
BLANCHE | I know. |
ROSE | I'm so glad you're up. |
BLANCHE | I'm sorry if I worried you. |
DOROTHY | Aw, sweetheart, how are you? |
BLANCHE | I'm okay. I really am. No. At first I wanted to give up, to die, truly. Only time I ever felt worse was when George died. But then I had the kids with me and I pulled through it. This time, I thought, "This is my last chance, my last hope for happiness." I just thought I'd never feel good again. |
SOPHIA | How long is this story? I'm 80. I have to plan. |
BLANCHE | This morning I woke up and I was in the shower, shampooing my hair, and I heard humming. I thought there was someone in there with me. No, it was me. I was humming. And humming means I'm feeling good. And then I realized I was feeling good because of you. You made the difference. You're my family, and you make me happy to be alive. |
DOROTHY and ROSE smile at her, touched. | |
ROSE | Let's drive to Coconut Grove for lunch. |
BLANCHE | Okay! |
ROSE | My treat. We have to celebrate. |
SOPHIA | What, that she came out of her room? |
ROSE | That we're together! |
DOROTHY | And that no matter what happens, even if we all get married, we'll stick together. |
ROSE | Then we'll need a much bigger house. |
DOROTHY | Sure, Rose. After lunch, you can pick up the lumber. |
The ladies get up from the patio table. | |
DOROTHY | Ma, you want to join us? |
SOPHIA | (gets up from her chair) Nope. I gotta rest. I got a date tonight. |
DOROTHY | Huh? With whom? |
SOPHIA | The fancy man and I are going to the dog track. |
SOPHIA exits STAGE RIGHT through the gate. | |
BLANCHE | Your mother bets? |
DOROTHY | No, she rides. She's a dog jockey. Let's go. |
BLANCHE, ROSE, and DOROTHY exit STAGE RIGHT through the lanai gate. Roll credits. |
We thought you were asleep.
- You never know.
[]
V - E - H List of The Golden Girls transcripts | |
---|---|
Season 1 | The Engagement • Guess Who's Coming to the Wedding • Rose the Prude • Transplant • The Triangle • On Golden Girls • The Competition • Break-In • Blanche and the Younger Man • The Heart Attack • The Return of Dorothy's Ex • The Custody Battle • A Little Romance • That Was No Lady • In a Bed of Rose's • The Truth Will Out • Nice and Easy • The Operation • Second Motherhood • Adult Education • The Flu • Job Hunting • Blind Ambitions • Big Daddy • The Way We Met |
Season 2 | End of the Curse • Ladies of the Evening • Take Him, He's Mine • It's a MIserable Life • Isn't It Romantic • Big Daddy's Little Lady • Family Affair • Vacation • Joust Between Friends • Love, Rose • 'Twas the Nightmare Before Christmas • The Sisters • The Stan who Came to Dinner • The Actor • Before and After • And Then There Was One • Bedtime Story • Forgive Me Father • Long Day's Journey into Marinara • Whose Face is This, Anyway? • Dorothy's Prized Pupil • Diamond in the Rough • Son-in-Law Dearest • To Catch a Neighbor • A Piece of Cake • Empty Nests |
Season 3 | Old Friends • One for the Money • Bringing Up Baby • The Housekeeper • Nothing to Fear But Fear Itself • Letters to Gorbachev • Strange Bedfellows • Brotherly Love • A Visit from Little Sven • The Audit • Three on a Couch • Charlie's Buddy • The Artist • Blanche's Little Girl • Dorothy's New Friend • Grab That Dough • My Brother, My Father • Golden Moments, Part I • Golden Moments, Part 2 • And Ma Makes Three • Larceny and Old Lace • Rose's Big Adventure • Mixed Blessings • Mister Terrific • Mother's Day |
Season 4 | Yes, We Have No Havanas • The Days and Nights of Sophia Petrillo • The One That Got Away • Yokel YHero • Bang the Drum, Stanley • Sophia's Wedding, Part 1 • Sophia's Wedding, Part 2 • Brother, Can You Spare That Jacket • Scared Straight • Stan Takes A Wife • The Auction • Blind Date • The Impotence of Being Ernest • Love Me Tender • Valentine's Day • Two Rode Together • You Gotta Have Hope • Fiddler on the Ropes • Till Death Do We Volley • High Anxiety • Little Sister • Sophia's Choice • Rites of Spring • Foreign Exchange • We're Outta Here, Part 1 • We're Outta Here, Part 1 |
Season 5 | Sick and Tired, Part 1 • Sick and Tired, Part 2 The Accurate Conception • Rose Fights Back • Love Under the Big Top • Dancing in the Dark • Not Another Monday • That Old Feeling • Comedy of Errors • All That Jazz • Ebb Tide • Have Yourself A Very Little Christmas • Blind Date • Mary Has A Little Lamb • Triple Play • CLinton Avenue Memoirs • Like the Beep Beep Beep of the Tom-Tom • An Illegitimate Concer • 72 HOurs • Twice In A Lifetime • Sisters and Other Strangers • Cheaters • The Mangiacavallo Curse Makes a Lousy Wedding Present • All Bets Are Off • The President's Coming! The President's Coming!, Part 1 • The President's Coming! The President's Coming!, Part 2 |
Season 6 | Blanche Delivers • Once, In St. Olaf • If At Last You Do Succeed • Snap Out Of It • Wham, Bam, Thank You Mammy • Feelings • Zborn Again • How Do You Solve a Problem Like Sophia? • Mrs. George Devereaux • Girls Just Wanna Have Fun... Before They Die • Stand By Your Man • Ebbtide's Revenge • The Bloom Is Off the Rose • Sisters of the Bride • Miles to Go • There Goes the Bride, Part 1 • There Goes the Bride, Part 2 • Older and Wiser • Melodrama • Even Grandmas Get the Blues • Witness • What A Difference A Date Makes • Love for Sale • Never Yell Fire in a Crowded Retirement Home, Part 1 • Never Yell Fire in a Crowded Retirement Home, Part 2 • Henny Penny — Straight, No Chaser |
Season 7 | Hey, Look Me Over • The Case of the Libertine Belle • Beauty and the Beast • That's For Me to Know • Where's Charlie? • Mother Load • Dateline: Miami • The Monkey Show, Part 1 • The Monkey Show: Part 2 • Ro$e Love$ Mile$ • Room Seven • From Here to the Pharmacy • The Pope's Ring • Old Boyfriends • Goodbye, Mr. Gordon • The Commitments • Questions and Answers • Ebbtide VI: The Wrath of Stan • Journey to the Center of Attention • A Midwinter Night's Dream, Part 1 • A Midwinter Night's Dream, Part 2 • Rose: Portrait of a Woman • Home Again, Rose, Part 1 • Home Again, Rose, Part 2 • One Flew Out of the Cuckoo's Nest, Part 1 • One Flew Out of the Cuckoo's Nest, Part 2 |