The Actor

The Actor was the 14th episode of Season 2 of The Golden Girls, also the 39th overall series episode. Directed by Terry Hughes and written by Barry Fanaro and Mort Nathan, the episode premiered on NBC-TV on January 17, 1987.

Synopsis
The girls decide to audition for their local theater production, a spoof of "Picnic" after learning that an attractive and famous actor, Patrick Vaughn, will be the lead. All three girls audition to play the lead Josie just so they can catch the man's eye, Blanche ever tries to use inflatables in her blouse only for them to pop. Unfortunately, Patrick chose Phyllis Hammerow to play Josie but he starts having affairs with all three women, not realising that they shared a house and each try to hide it from the other. Sophia meanwhile has a part time job in at Captain Jack's Seafood Shanty despite Dorothy's forbidding it.

Opening Night arrives and Dorothy is forced to play the Sheriff after the actor falls sick, Rose was to gift Patrick a Red Rose only for Blanche to convince her it was bad luck, when she tries to do the same with Phyllis she reveals that she was dating Patrick. The show starts and Blanche, Dorothy and Rose discover the truth, they confront Patrick along with the rest of the female cast members of his cheating, Patrick apologises then leaves and the audience thinking that it was part of the show give it a standing ovation.

Scene excerpts

 * Quotes from the script


 * Rose: I feel so common, so cheap... so used. How do you usually deal with that Blanche?
 * Blanche: ...Rose, just for that I'm going to flush the toilet tonight while you're taking a shower.
 * Dorothy: Rose, why don't we just show Mr. Vaughn around the theatre.
 * Blanche: Well, why don't I just do that myself, since I've had the most much experience performing here.
 * Dorothy: Blanche, the parking lot doesn't count, I'll do it.

[Sophia has been employed at Captain Jack's Seafood Shanty restaurant and is wearing her pirate uniform]
 * Rose: Sophia, is that a Captain Jack's Seafood Shanty uniform?
 * Sophia: No, Rose. I'm off to discover the Straits of Magellan. Yo ho!

Guest starring

 * Lloyd Bochner as Patrick Vaughn
 * Janet Carroll as Phyllis Hammerow
 * Frank Birney as the Stage Manager