'Twas The Nightmare Before Christmas

 was the 11th episode of Season 2 of The Golden Girls, also the 36th overall episode. The episode was director by Terry Hughes, and written by Barry Fanaro and Mort Nathan. It premiered on NBC-TV on December 20, 1986.

Season 2

Episode 11

Director by: Terry Hughes

Written by: Susan Harris, Barry Fanaro, and Mort Nathan

Created by: Susan Harris

Starring:

Beatrice Arthur as Dorothy Zbornak

Betty White as Rose Nylund

Rue McClanahan as Blanche Devereaux

Estelle Getty as Sophia Petrillo

Terry Kiser as Santa Claus

Craig Richard Nelson as Thurber

Teddy Wilson as Albert

Sam Anderson as Meyer

Buddy Daniels as Airport Mendicant

Summary/Synopsis
The four girls all plan to visit their respective families on Christmas Day. However, their plans were soon foiled when they were held hostage by a man dressed as Santa Claus at the Grief Counseling Center where Rose Nylund works.

Plot
Blanche returns home early with a man dressed up in a Santa outfit, whom she was about to conquer when the other girls return home as well. Blanche's master plan to seduce the Santa man are destroyed, which leaves Blanche aggravated. Dorothy admits she is feeling a little blue as all Christmases seem to be about shopping and wasting money away. Rose suggests they should have a little celebration at home that Christmas Eve night by sharing home made gifts for one another before they depart to spend Christmas Day with their respective families. Evening is upon the four girls, and the gift sharing turns to Blanche to distribute her gift to the girls. Blanche's gift is a homemade calendar called 'The Men of Blanche's Boudoir', displaying the twelve men she had the 'best time' with. The four girls laugh the night away after bearing witness to Blanche's outrageously ignominious acts of seduction.

The following day, Blanche and Dorothy are sitting and waiting at Rose's Grief Counseling Center while Rose finishes up her shift with a few, remaining clients. However, a man dressed as Santa unexpectedly holds Blanche, Dorothy, Rose, and two other male clients at gunpoint. It turns out the Santa man is just a lonesome man who just wants a little cheer on Christmas Day. Blanche chimes in with Rose and Dorothy to plan on tackling and maybe 'give him a karate chop' on the Santa man.

Rose: We're gonna miss our plane. What can we do?

Blanche: Listen, girls, I have an idea. Now, I'm going to create a diversion by bending over and picking up something seductively, then the two of you sneak up behind him and give him a karate chop.

Dorothy: Blanche, what do we look like? Charlie's Angels?

Blanche: I have been told I bear a striking resemblance to Miss Cheryl Ladd. Although, my bosoms are perkier.

Dorothy: Not even if you were hanging upside down on a trapeze.

However, Rose becomes upset at the Santa man for acting so selfishly and that maybe he should realize as to why he is alone. By the time Rose is finishing her moral explanation, Sophia enters the Grief Counseling Center after being left out in the car for a bit too long than she would like, and then snatches the gun from the Santa man without him even realizing. Sophia reveals the gun is in fact a harmless toy gun. The three girls and the two male clients were relieved and freed instantaneously.

Subsequent the girls being held hostage by the Santa man, the four are seen running through the airport terminal to get to their departure gates just in time for boarding. However, due to inclement weather, their flights were cancelled. The girls are left grounded in Miami, Florida for Christmas Day. The four drag their feet to a nearby diner for coffee and cheesecake, completely sullen and dismayed they will not be seeing their families on Christmas Day. The four see a lone diner employee running the diner by himself, yet they think nothing of it. The diner employee begins to converse with the four girls, explaining he perceived the four were family being out at a diner on Christmas Day. To much of the girls' surprise, their moods improved significantly. They were family indeed. The four girls thank the diner employee's random act of kindness heartfeltly, and allow for him to go and see his family for an hour or two while the girls run the diner. (Luckily, no customers came.)

The episode closes with the four girls looking out of the diner window, smiling and hugging one another in glee on a nearly perfect Christmas Day - together just like family.

Merry Christmas, Golden Girls!

Edited by: Jessica Aleksandra

Trivia

 * Two of the production crewmen on the TV series were used to play practical jokes on the cast for this episode. The two production crewmen took multiple semi-nude pictures of themselves, printed the photos out, and placed the photos on each page of 'The Men of Blanche's Boudoir' calendar, which was used on the episode: "'Twas The Nightmare Before Christmas".
 * The title of this episode refers to Clement Clarke Moore's poem, 'A Visit from St. Nicholas', otherwise more commonly known today as 'Twas the Night Before Christmas'.
 * Near the end of the episode, when the girls are seen in the diner, the exterior shot before the beginning of the scene is of "The Roadside Diner" (its real name) which is (as of 8/2012) and has been in business for decades. It's in Wall Township, New Jersey, a few miles outside of Farmingdale, NJ, just west of the Collingwood Circle. This particular diner has also been used as the location for scenes in several movies over the years.

Scene Excerpts

 * Quotes from the episode:
 * Airport Mendicant: Excuse me. Would you like to buy a flower?
 * Sophia:  Beat it, chrome-dome! And while you're at it, get a job! Get a suit! And get on your knees and beg your mother's forgiveness!


 * Blanche: Did I ever tell you, girls? I met my husband George on Christmas Eve?
 * Blanche: Let me tell you just how exciting a Christmas Eve can be. I was home from college on Christmas vacation, when my best friend, Lisa Jane Biedler, fixed me up with the most beautiful boy I've ever laid my eyes on.
 * Dorothy: George.


 * Blanche:  No, this was Richard Jay Wilde. And believe me, his name said it all! Huh-huh-huh! We must've pulled over on the side of the road five times on our way to that Christmas dance. Ha-hah!
 * Rose: It's always best to drive defensively over the holidays.
 * Blanche: Anyway, when we finally got to the dance, why, Richard dropped me off; and I turned and ran smack into a man so gorgeous he made Richard Jay Wilde look like a pre-pubescent choirboy.
 * Rose: George.
 * Blanche: : No-no, no. Ernie Willis. Well, Ernie smiled. And the next thing I knew, we were dancing in a local bar. When all of a sudden I heard a deep voice say, "Hm-hm... May I cut in?" Well when I turned, I saw the man I knew I was gonna spend the rest of my life with.
 * Albert: George.
 * Blanche: Uh, no. No. Thomas Pennville. Uh-huh. Well, after Thomas and I left...
 * Dorothy: Blanche! I could get herpes listening to this story!


 * Dorothy: [looking through The Men of Blanche's Boudoir calendar] WHOA!
 * Blanche: September?
 * Dorothy: Yep...
 * Sophia: I'm surprised you were able to walk in October.

Guest Stars

 * Theodore Wilson as Albert
 * Sam Anderson as Meyer
 * Buddy Daniels as Airport Mendicant
 * Terry Kiser as Santa Claus
 * Craig Richard Nelson as Thurber